


You're Welcome

by TenSpencerRiedPlease



Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Iron Man (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Competition, Crack, Humor, I Don't Even Know, I just woke up this morning and decided on this, M/M, Racebending, Random & Short, Tony Being Tony, Tony and Stephen are so fucking Extra, also Strange is Asian for reasons, because Stephen and Tony both want to be the best, dont ask, jokes on them they're both good, so they straight up compete to be the best boyfriend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-14
Updated: 2017-07-14
Packaged: 2018-12-02 00:01:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11497560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TenSpencerRiedPlease/pseuds/TenSpencerRiedPlease
Summary: There were moments in life that were pretty weird for Tony, or pretty much everyone else, but meeting the version of himself that became a doctor was probably the weirdest. He hadn’t even noticed it at first because he was balls deep in a conversation about spinal reconstruction with some guy at a party and, for some reason, arguing about the best way to do it despite the fact that Tony has never evenseena medical instrument in real life.





	You're Welcome

**Author's Note:**

> That song from Moana, You're Welcome, totally fits this as far as tone except neither Tony nor Strange steal boats after singing a child into a false sense of security. But the 'you're welcome for how awesome i am', totally this.

There were moments in life that were pretty weird for Tony, or pretty much everyone else, but meeting the version of himself that became a doctor was probably the weirdest. He hadn’t even noticed it at first because he was balls deep in a conversation about spinal reconstruction with some guy at a party and, for some reason, arguing about the best way to do it despite the fact that Tony has never even _seen_ a medical instrument in real life. Well, not the ones you’d need for that surgery anyways but for some reason he feels compelled to argue about it until Rhodey drags him off. His companion, Stephen Strange if he didn’t lie about his name, simply smirks as Rhodes drags him off surely to embarrass him when he was absolutely winning that argument.

“Tony no,” he says as soon as they’re around a corner.

“‘No’?” Tony repeats in a much sassier ‘are you kidding me’ tone.

“You are not dating you!” Rhodey tells him, flicking his nose and Tony swats his hand away.

“What are you even talking about?” he asks.

“The guy, Strange or whatever, is literally the Asian doctor version of you and you’re not dating him,” Rhodey says.

Tony squints, “we were talking about spinal reconstruction, not hooking up Rhodes.”

Rhodey lets out a long, put upon sigh. “No, you were basically fondling each other’s balls via a knowledge competition in the middle of a giant crowd. You forget that time you admitted to me that math turns you on,” he says.

He really regretted that too because now Rhodey made it weird every chance he got. “That was not what was happening and I hate to break it to you but spines aren’t math so you’re wrong,” he says, nose in the air.

“You know what when you get mad that you’re dating you but Asian do not come to me complaining, okay?” Rhodey says, giving him that look that means he had to promise he wasn’t going to complain.

Tony, because he’s an idiot, agrees to the terms and goes back to find his new doctor friend to argue about spines again.

*

Stephen Strange has always had a fascination with intelligence and a knack for finding it too. There was a reason he refused to work with anyone who wasn’t Christine. The woman was far more intelligent than even she gave herself credit for. He needed someone who could think quickly on their feet and follow his own intelligence and finding that wasn’t easy. Christine had at least filled that at work but his love life was mostly lacking. It hadn’t been something he cared about really, at least not until he met one Tony Stark at a gala that neither of them wanted to be at and they got into an argument about spinal reconstruction.

He knew damn well that Stark has never even _touched_ a surgical instrument but his ability to argue was both fascinating and impressive. More so because about three quarters of the way through the argument he realized Stark was _right_. Not that Stephen wouldn’t have faired just fine using the method he had been advocating but he had to admit that he wasn’t wrong often and certainly not to people who weren’t experts in his field. So he continues to argue just to see how this would go.

At some point that friend of his, the military buddy, drags him off but Tony returns not long after and picks up on his argument exactly where he left off. They throw statistics, medical knowledge, and various other bodily improbabilities back and forth for some time before it occurs to either one of them that they were standing in front of Tony’s rather impressive sports car. They go silent for a few seconds before Tony gestures to the passenger seat, “get in, I’m right and you’re going to realize it,” he says and then they go right back to arguing.

He does eventually admit that maybe Tony had a point but he does so grudgingly. Tony rubs it in his face until he starts a new argument and then they set off on that but this time Stephen _knows_ he’s right. He waited patiently to rub it in Tony’s face like Tony had done to him because it was only fair.

*

When Tony sees Strange’s garage he finally sees what Rhodey meant by ‘you but Asian’. So maybe he and Strange had a lot in common, including a love of rare sports car models that didn’t really ever hit mainstream markets. “You bastard, I _wanted_ this,” he says, gesturing to a sleek black car that was all aerodynamics and style. Of course his would have been a bright, candy apple red instead of black but that was just him.

“It was the last one in the country and I happened to snag it out from under another buyer,” Strange says, grinning like he knew he personally slighted Tony. Except Tony actually _was_ the buyer he was talking about. He had no idea who had managed to snatch his car but now that he knew he had to have it. He _needed_ it.

“You don’t even appreciate it like I would,” he says and it’s true. As an engineer Tony knew what this piece really was aside from looking cool, he knew _exactly_ how everything in it worked. He wants to reach out and touch it but that would be a bit too much and he needed leverage here.

Strange leans against the car and Tony wants to smack him for going anywhere near that paintjob in those jeans. What if he damaged it? “I appreciate it just fine, Stark,” he says in that arrogant ‘I know better than you’ voice.

He did _not_ know better than Tony, not about this anyways. “Uh, no you don’t. This is an engineer’s wet dream and you are a measly doctor so you know that it looks pretty and matches you hair,” he says in a mocking tone.

“Oh I can tell you everything there is to know about this car, want to test me?” he asks, raising an eyebrow. The looks on his face indicates that he _does_ know everything about the car but memorizing the manual was basically caveman worthy.

“Ohh, you memorized what the seller’s pamphlet told you, big deal. You don’t know everything about it until you can fix it,” he says proudly. He knew everything there was to know about the engine, how the breaks worked and why they were unique, what the pitfalls of having the doors designed that way were, and how to alter all of those things to make it run more efficiently. He knew more about that car than the guy that designed that car.

Strange gives the car a loving pat, “I probably could if I felt like it,” he says and Tony gasps in offense.

“Don’t you dare butcher this car with your sausage fingers!” he says, taking a defensive step towards the car.

That gets him a sharp laugh from Strange as he shakes his head, “Stark I am a world class surgeon, I don’t have sausage fingers. Besides, if memory serves that’s something you have intimate knowledge of,” he says and he grins, winking at Tony.

Okay so there was that one time after the gala but there was no need to bring that up now. “Being able to fix people does not mean you can fix cars. This is a thing of beauty and you need to keep your clumsy knowledge away from it,” Tony tells him half crouched over the hood of the car.

Strange considers him for a long moment before he shakes his head and gives Tony an admittedly very attractive smile. “Tell you what Stark, if you can drive it like you own it it’s yours,” he says.

Tony just about has an orgasm on the spot and he all but runs to the drivers door, “keys,” is all he says, snatching them out of the air as Strange throws them.

They spend the whole night driving, flying around corners at speeds that would be impossible for someone who didn’t know how to properly operate the car. When Strange mentions it Tony grins, “I can feel exactly how everything in this car works by just sitting in while it’s running,” he says as they fly around another sharp turn. The wheels don’t even leave the road. “I know exactly how to test the mechanics, how well they’ll respond to what I’m about to do, how to alter what I’m doing so the car responds _just_ the way I want it to. You’re break pads need to be replaced because you ride them too hard, the mechanics in the passenger window are off by a few seconds, and there’s something up with your exhaust. I knew all of this before we even left the garage.”

“Impressive,” Strange says, “what else can you tell me?”

He knew lots of other things, most of them about Strange thanks to the way he drives this car. “I know that you prefer driving fast, very fast thanks to how your tires handle. You don’t really slow down on the turns either but you don’t know how to do that while working with the car. Like I said, your break pads need to be replaced. Your steering is off slightly, probably thanks to your reckless driving and hairpin turns. You also need to realign your tires because it pulls to the left slightly. In short not only do I now own this car but you need a driving lesson,” he says smugly.

“You’re probably the most amazing person I’ve ever met,” Strange tells him and Tony grins.

“Of course I am,” he says like he actually believes this. He’s somewhat surprised to find that Strange clearly does but he’ll take it because he’s never met anyone quite like Stephen Strange and he was intent on learning more.

*

Stephen has never heard anyone talk about anything like he talked about medicine. Yes, he knew he was arrogant about it and he damn well had a right to be given how good he was, but he _loved_ medicine. His parents wanted him to be an engineer because they had been and he was good at it but he never really liked it, certainly not the way Tony did. He had done the work on autopilot for almost a year until he accidentally stumbled into a medical class. In a matter of seconds he fell in love and he never did look back even when his parents disapproved. It seemed strange (no pun intended) to his friends that his parents were upset with his being a _doctor_ , especially when he ended up being one of the best doctors in the world, but his parents had always had a strict idea of who they wanted him to be. Not unlike most parents, he supposed.

The point though, was that people simply didn’t understand how he came to enjoy his job. People joked about hating theirs, about loathing spending time there and he just didn’t understand. His parents’ disappointment was the only disappointment that surrounded his job so to him the idea that a job was something to hate was foreign. The problem came later when medicine became one of his only loves and from there it became difficult to connect with people. Not many people wanted to talk about surgery because it was ‘gross’ and over the years as he perfected his craft medicine became the only topic he ever had any long standing interest it. At least until he met Tony.

Passion was a drawing trait and Tony had it in spades when he talked about his technology. Stephen could watch his entire body shift and change as he assumed the position of the expert, drawing his back straighter and his voice got a little deeper as he talked about his new project. He took questions easily, learned to explain things in simpler terms even if Stephen could see how it killed him to do it, and when people questioned his authority he rightfully blew them off. Stephen was far less graceful about his own expertise. He knew he wasn’t the greatest at explaining things and he absolutely refused to dumb things down for people, and he knew he was even worse at dealing with people questioning his authority. Back in medical school be became quite known for arguing with the professors and teachers and students alike hated him for it. But he was better and that wasn’t his fault. Tony though, he dealt with it in a way that was almost elegant to watch, and amusing. He disliked people questioning his authority too but he was better at proving they were idiots to himself and everyone around him when he told them off.

Watching Tony talk about technology quickly became something he unexpectedly enjoyed. Engineering had never been his passion and truthfully, though he would never admit it to anyone and _least_ of all Tony, most of Tony’s projects went over his head but the content of the conversations didn’t matter so much as the tone. Oh, he tried to keep up and he absolutely did research on the things Tony talked about because he wasn’t fond of being behind in topics but he was nowhere near as intelligent as Tony in that area. To be fair Tony was not nearly as knowledgeable as him in the medical field so it made up for his own lack of knowledge, not that Tony could resist arguing with him on all fronts. He liked the way they bickered though because no one else even bothered with him, or, he supposed, he didn’t think anyone was _smart_ enough to bicker with him like Tony did.

So they traded knowledge back and forth through their arguments, surprised that the other was willing to put up with so much talk of the other’s passion. But then most people certainly couldn’t keep up with them, could they?

*

Pepper sighs as she and Rhodey sit down, thankfully Stephen and Tony free, and they let themselves relax. “Do you think they’ll ever give it up with the gift giving?” she asks. Two people who didn’t do things small in any capacity but especially gift giving, she has decided, was absolutely awful. First Tony bought Strange a watch because he was fond of them despite Tony’s constant reminder that they were obsolete. Then Strange somehow got a _car_ into the Stark Industries lobby- Pepper was completely unsure of how that was even possible.

Tony responded by doing his research to find Strange cases that were unusual enough that he’d take them, which turned out to be a pretty narrow scope of people. Strange then decided that having some obscure vehicle engineer that was retired design Tony a _custom model_ was an acceptable gift. Tony bought Strange an entire store of Rolexes and, because Tony apparently felt the need for more dramatics, also had several watches custom made with Strange in particular in mind. One was a rather nice watch that vaguely looked like the round bit of a stethoscope. Strange bought Tony some obscure model of some random piece of technology that Pepper had been convinced was junk but according to Tony the thing was both very rare and in very good condition. So he bought Strange an entire museum of medical history.

This had been going on back and forth for the last year and now and Pepper was getting sick of their dramatics. She and Rhodey needed to develop a plan so they could take back their lives given that both of them often received calls at absurd times asking after the acceptability of the latest gift idea. “Have either one of them proposed yet?” Rhodey asks and Pepper lets out a sigh of relief.

“Do you think that would work?” she asks. Tony wasn’t really the marrying type but Rhodey knew things about him that she didn’t so maybe he had some bit of knowledge that she didn’t.

“Well, if you convince him that it’s the only way to win,” Rhodey says and Pepper nods.

“I knew I came to you for a reason,” she tells him.

“Because of my good looks and charm?” Rhodey asks, grinning.

“You need to stop spending so much time with Tony,” she says but she laughs anyways.

*

Tony thought about that ring for a stupid amount of time because it needed to be _perfect_. He wasn’t going to get some stupid ring that he could have given to _Rhodey_ it was so impersonal so he did his research and found a medical ring that was probably old enough that it would fall apart if touched but it wasn’t as if Stephen was going to wear it. Being a doctor meant no jewelry at least while working and he was always working so mostly it was presentation that mattered.

When he pulls out the ring at a small get together though Stephen just makes an annoyed noise and throws a box at Tony and storms out. Pepper leans over and pats his shoulder, “I’m so sorry Tony,” she says, looking upset.

He frowns, “for what?”

Pepper blinks a few times in surprise, “Tony, he just stormed out of the room,” she says like she doesn’t know what just happened.

“Yeah, he’s bad that I proposed first,” he says. “I won.” Pepper stares at him like she’s wondering if he’s in shock or something until Christine speaks.

“Yeah, he’s right. He’ll get over it,” she says even though she doesn’t look so sure. Tony had faith that Stephen would grow up and admit who was superior in gift giving here.

*

For three days Stephen says nothing to Tony and Tony lets him ride his annoyance out because he’s trying to synthetize an element anyways so he could use the extra time. Then on the forth morning Stephen shows up with some wine, probably completely unaware of what time of day it is looking smug. “Okay but I won so you don’t get to be smug,” Tony tells him, taking the wine and ignoring the last three days of silence. That happened when your significant other was just the better gift giver.

“Oh no you didn’t,” Stephen says and he pulls out a StarkPad, courtesy of Tony, and shows him his ideas for the wedding’s location.

“We are not getting married in a church. First, I’m an atheist and even if I wasn’t I would probably burst into flame if I entered one. A castle has merit though,” he says, swiping through the locations.

They go back to arguing over what was best and which date they’d choose and a million other things but it’s the color scheme that takes the cake. “No Tony, we are not doing red and yellow that is disgusting,” Stephen says and Tony makes a scandalized noise.

“First off I said red and _gold_ , not red and yellow. Second of all what ideas have _you_ come up with?” he asks, raising an eyebrow.

“White,” Stephen says primly, “I will accept red but the other color will be white.”

Tony snorts, “so we’re getting married in a bloody hospital? Or on a Canadian flag? Absolutely not.”

Stephen lets out a long sigh, “fine. We can do grey,” he says.

“So we have a fun lively color and then a boring color? Gross,” Tony tells him, nose in the air.

“Fine then _silver_ ,” Stephen says.

“Fine, I’ll take it but only for your sake,” Tony says even though he actually thinks that’s a nice combination. He’d prefer gold but silver would do.

*

“I think behind a waterfall would be pretty,” Stephen tells him. Better than his boring and generic beach wedding idea, Tony thinks, but also better than Tony’s wedding on a cliff. One strong breeze, Stephen had said, and there goes the wedding party.

“And loud,” Tony points out even though he likes the idea. It was just customary to be an ass about it though, it was how they worked.

“Fine, than make something that would make it quiet,” Stephen says. “I should also point out that getting behind a waterfall would be difficult for the media.”

Oh of _course_ he thought of that while also considering the aesthetics. Asshole. “Fine then, maybe I _will_ ,” he tells him and he goes off to his lab ignoring Stephen’s smug smile because he didn’t win, Tony was the one who would even make that idea doable without everyone screaming at each other to be heard. So _clearly_ he won.

*

“Take it easy on the turns, Strange!” Tony yells as they fly around another corner. The wheels leave the ground and Tony is seeing death but Stephen, at least, seems to be having fun as he laughs.

“It’s fine,” Stephen says and they turn a sharp corner again. Driving lessons, Tony has decided, were an absolute bust because Stephen was a terrible listener. But then he knew that, and Christine warned him of that, and Rhodey _did_ tell him he was dating the Asian version of himself. Which was weird when he started noticing the similarities, particularly in the stylized facial hair. But they liked looking pretty, was that suck a crime? Plus now they had another person to bounce face hair ideas off of and both of them have come up with some neat ideas for the other.

Now that was their new thing, figuring out new beard styles. Pepper told them that they should cut it out before they looked like people from some Capitol thing and it took them a solid month to figure out that she was referencing the Hunger Games novels and only because Christine made a similar comment and told them both to pay more attention to pop culture.

Stephen takes another sharp turn, laughing harder when he notices Tony gripping the seat as they go. “Jesus Stark, live a little!” he says as they fly down the road.

“I live just fine,” Tony tells him, “but you don’t know how to drive and it’s making me nervous! My parents died in a car crash and I am not about to be next!”

That at least gets him to slow down a whole two freaking miles but it doesn’t get him to take his turns easier and Tony lets out a string of expletives. “Strange!” Tony tells.

“Perhaps,” he says back, laughing as he takes another sharp turn.

“You are bad at considering other people’s feelings!” Tony tells him, tense as Stephen drives at top speeds down the road.

“Are you okay?” Stephen asks as they turn another corner. The car protests as it goes, letting out a low whine that definitely means that this car needed work now because Stephen Strange was a terrible driver.

“You pull this car over right now, she’s screaming!” Tony yells at him.

Thankfully Stephen listens and hops out and Tony practically throws himself on the ground, “land!” he yells, hugging the grass as best as he could.

“Don’t be dramatic Stark, my driving isn’t _that_ bad,” Stephen says but Tony has already banned him from driving anything ever again. He had no clue how this man got a license but it was herby _revoked_.

“Yes it is you are never driving again for my safety and the safety of the world. If you screwed up the steering I’m going to kick your ass,” he says as he picks himself up off the ground and walks around to the other wide of the car.

“The steering is fine, Stark, calm down,” Stephen says.

Tony sits behind the steering wheel and lets himself relax a little because now he was here and the car was under the control of a person who actually knew how to drive the fucking thing. They go to take off and Tony swears, “you jackass you screwed over the breaks on this poor car too! We’ll get home I _guess_ ,” he says dramatically.

“I’ve driven with worse,” Stephen says and Tony is apprehending all his vehicles for the next for _ever_. Happy could drive him around.

*

“So,” Stephen says as they lay down in their hotel room going stir crazy due to their time off. “That wedding turned out awesome, which means I won.”

“It wouldn’t have been awesome if I didn’t manage to make an invisible sound barrier that turned the waterfall into a pretty decoration instead of a loud hell beast that would end in everyone yelling to be heard. So no, you did not win _I_ won. Our wedding would have been a screaming match with a waterfall if it wasn’t for me,” he points out.

“But I chose the location,” Stephen reminds him.

“The very loud location that was only feasible thanks to me. So I won,” Tony says.

“I chose the color scheme,” Stephen says.

“You chose the _silver_ , which was the _boring_ half of the color scheme so that doesn’t even count. Besides, I paid for everything,” he says smugly.

“You did not!” Stephen says to him and Tony just _grins_. “You bastard, I was supposed to pay for half!”

“Uh huh. But I thought it would be a good wedding present so I paid for it all,” Tony says. It turned out Stephen was freakishly good at organizing things so he did most of the heavy lifting there while Tony threw out ideas so he paid for it all to balance things out.

“You know what would be a better present?” Stephen says, “getting us the hell out of here. Seriously, I am going nuts with nothing to do.”

“Agreed. We should turn Pepper’s and Christine’s wedding present around on them and give _them_ our vacation time so that they know what it’s like to suffer the way we have. Also they’d make an adorable couple,” he says. Frighteningly competent women just belonged together in Tony’s opinion. And Pepper’s love life was lackluster; he had to do his job as her best friend and wingman to hook her up with someone. She’s been gracious enough to put up with _his_ love life and honestly there were some things that definitely didn’t fall into her job description.

Stephen sits up straight, “I’m the one that’s going to get them together!” he says and Tony jumps at his phone because _no_ , he was _not_.


End file.
